Kernels
- joneworlds@mailbox.org
## Bowl 7
7. It was like looking at your finger that's been
chopped off, lying there on the cutting board, but
somehow without the pain. It's right there in
front of you and it was part of you, and now it's
not. I didn't react like I thought I would.
6. It still smells a bit inside that old
drawer. Or maybe I just think it does. Could be
it's just leftover guilt and shame, wafting up my
nose.
5. You got to keep them in bags. The good ones, at
least. You don't want the little creepers getting
in there, and doing what they do.
4. When we went to see what was left, the hallway
table was still standing. And you know, there was
still a toy car waiting in the little basket on
top, after all these years. I guess they never
claimed that one.
3. Steve had what I thought was some helpful
advice on how to handle feelings of
frustration. But at our follow-up session the next
week, he was all focused on how my cabin air
filter needed replacement. Maybe driving into
Speed-E-Loob isn't the best place to find therapy.
2. I avoid the wrecker yard after dark. That's
when the zombie cars come out. They're usually
green.
1. Leather? It's not even a problem; I'll find you
a blue one, or even yellow. But I'm telling you
clearly, right now: you keep the balloons out,
understand?
## Bowl 6
10. I guess I got tired of always fixing it. You
know, like when a thing is not working quite
right, I would figure out some changes or
whatever. But eventually I got to be like, "okay,
for this piece, I'd rather give up the benefit of
having it at all, rather than to always be
fiddling with it."
9. How many cereal boxes did they go through to
find that? By now it's all fairies and frogs, and
so many scratches. That's why we never swept up
the needles.
8. It won't take but a minute. I'm going to leave
another jug by the downspout, just like I do every
year. And that bag of dog shit by the door will
probably still be there too, on the corner of the
porch.
7. I can still remember it rolling up on its two
wheels. And that weird old man was looking on at
us from his window in the cottage across the
field. Dark as it was, the moon lit up the snow
all around, and I'll never forget the glittering.
6. The box was plain and said just "crackers",
nothing else. That should have tipped her off
right away that something was off. That, and the
ankle-deep raspberry jam flowing down the isle;
quite abnormal, quite unsettling.
5. It was a hand-painted sign that read, "SLOW
KIDS". Of course it turned out to be a traffic
warning, not an ad for a club. It was pretty
embarrassing when we knocked on their door and
asked to join.
4. An anoxic lake is still okay for swimming. But
next year, let's remember to bring more pop tarts.
And the trampoline repair kit, of course.
3. The helicopter dropped us off in a clearing in
the forest about 500 kilometers north of Mount
Engrin. That's wild and empty country. And so
when we started seeing the painted flower pots
hanging from the lower branches, it was pretty
chilling.
2. I guess I like it because it seems
tidy. Others call it "simple", but that's not what
I see. I don't mind complicated if it's tidy.
1. Twenty six times she had tried to close that
door, but the latch was too broken. I found her
still there a few hours later, sitting outside on
the crates. The knapsack was soaked through by
then, and she was crying.
## Bowl 5
10. When the cord pulled the bucket off the
counter, the beads went everywhere. Then the
scattering began. We'd still find them here and
there years later.
9. I've never seen him without that heavy
cardboard box. I've never known what was in it and
he never would say, so I didn't press him on
it. But we ought to have known there'd be trouble
on that day when he showed up without it.
8. I smelled something, and I saw something. It
wasn't much, but I guessed it had to be another
one of those coyotes. As it turned out, I was as
wrong as could be.
7. We all agreed that he was not sane anymore. But
even he could tell the difference between a bag of
oranges and a bag of tricks on that morning when
the fish arrived. And also he knew computers, and
no machines are more rational than those.
6. They dressed up the tiny yard in the
front. There were clay figurines smiling
everywhere, and blown-glass balls, and lots and
lots of flower pots. Some said they should have
rather addressed the bigger problem, but I don't
know about that.
5. It was so dry for so long, and the grass
yellowed like it will. But when the rain finally
came, it all just turned black. Except a few bits
and blades here and there, amongst all the dead.
4. We'd spend that afternoon driving around,
looking for someone to cut that glass. The sun
baking the weeds in the curbs. That oil and grease
smell, it never leaves those places.
3. The first thing I saw when I opened by eyes was
that bottle of orange juice from the night before,
standing in the center console. They were moving
around in the front seat, still there, and just
for a moment I felt so full of safety despite all
else. I'll never forget that.
2. For their spirits to leave us in that ruin of
revulsion, I knew no good would come of it. Now
they'll never rest. They'll be following us until
the end, until the earth turns sour.
1. Then she's saying that everyone is worthy of
love and respect, that this is not in doubt. And
that the problem is that most people have so
little love and respect left to give, that they
get choosy, and their baseline allowance for
everyone drops to nothing. And so some people end
up getting none at all, their soul starving to
death.
## Bowl 4
10. Now these fence boards are finally mine, after
all these years. And as I pried off those five, I
so wanted to feel excited to see inside at
last. But in the end it's just another Ford there
in the long dry grass, all of it gone to seed and
rust.
--
9. It's hard to see it get always smaller day by
day, no matter how much more we make. I thought it
was on its way. Could it be that it's tougher to
lose ground than never to make it.
--
8. They're running out of time, but they won't let
go. Have you been to the garage since last
Tuesday? What goes on between those two unicorns
may better be left unsaid.
--
7. At first, things were pretty good. It was fun,
finding golf balls buried in the forest. But when
the sanitizer and peanut butter ran out, that's
when the wheels fell off.
--
6. It took a long time for us to walk to water's
edge at the lowest tide. Even there, the now-still
windmills seemed far off. White as ever, these
massive monuments of both hope and despair will
watch us wither away once again.
--
5. Jill saw the zombie stuck in the tree. She felt
she couldn't just leave it there, but when she
helped it down, it ate her brain all the same. It
was still a zombie, after all.
--
4. Then his bag of marbles ripped open, and they
all went rolling down into the blood puddle. I
wanted to help, for a minute. But then the wagon
pulled up, and that was a bigger problem.
--
3. I mean, I tried to glue it back together, but
it's not working. What was I thinking? It's a
recorder, not a pair of pliers.
--
2. The motor is getting hotter and the dough is
getting stiffer. That's when she says she'll be
back in another day. And so there's still time to
clean up that pee under the table.
--
1. Just because they're making something, doesn't
make it right. They're out there again behind the
tractor trailer in the lot. Always doing their
work by the light of the moon, those two.
## Bowl 3
10. I wish they were rarer. Somehow that delight
in them is not multiplied by having more access to
them, but rather it somehow blunts it. It is
surprising and dismaying too, because I cannot go
back, now.
--
9. I saw a bird with a square head. It seemed
awkward and hesitant to move as it stood there on
the pavement. Strange as it was, I am mostly sure
it was not one of the robot birds, although every
year it gets harder to tell them apart.
--
8. Nature had not been so kind with him. There was
the stooped back, the unusual smell, and several
missing fingers. But the thing that made people
shake their heads, was the large electric box fan
where his head should have been.
--
7. The right to repair - it sounds so poetic. On
the other hand, there's bound to be broken. That
sounds pretty good too.
--
6. His foot is strangely shaped. But only if you
have been looking at it for a long time. And when
you do see it, some of the other stuff about that
house starts to make sense.
--
5. The sight of those lampposts laying in the
grass still haunts me to this day. How could
something like that come into a place like this?
It always happens when you think your toes touch
bottom.
--
4. Sometimes, the afternoon heat has that smell of
silence hanging on it, weighing it down. I can
feel it when I put on my shoes. The cords remind
me of that afternoon years ago when I was a child,
when the water began to brown.
--
3. The cottonwood seeds came in think this
year. Last year, the seeds were all red for some
reason. I don't know what that means, but it seems
somehow unhealthy.
--
2. I think the mean somehow seeped in from the
streets, and into here. It's all toughness and
hardness in there now. But I remember the spring
sunsets, purple in the back lot, and how we would
talk of many things.
--
1. The shifting shadows should not bother me
anymore. But the newer drones don't drive through
here any more. Next year, they won't at all.
## Bowl 2
10. When I saw the blue, yellow, and green bears,
I knew something was up. But then an orange one?
That's when I decided that the shed had to go.
--
9. She dropped the blue duo-tang on the way out
the back door to the under-cover. With the sun and
saw-horses in that late-afternoon summer sun, it's
so sweet and private back there. Now let's go get
that nintendo back out of the sand again.
--
8. Ten thousand daisies in that grass, yet the
goalpost still fell over. So much for all those
tacos we were saving for Susan. It's going to be a
long, long week.
--
7. When the moth hit the windshield, it left
behind this dusty smudge. I don't know what
happened to it after that. But it was a lot less
damaging than that deer would be the next day.
--
6. I watched it fall ten stories. When it landed
on the lane-way, the red parts shot out across the
lot on the other side. And it gave me that funny
feeling you get when something reminds you of a
thing, but you can't quite tell what.
--
5. While I'm stopped by the trash can, that's when
I saw the robot. It's rolling along in the field,
tracing the same square in the dust over and over
as it goes. I wonder how long it's been left to do
that.
--
4. I scatter them on this bare patch and rake them
in, and let them fend for themselves. Some will
make it, some will not. And I like that better
than trying to plan things out.
--
3. Every spring, I buy one pack of each kind of
seeds, and mix them all together. A few years
back, a pack of marigolds had a funny grey seed in
it, not like the others. I think the money bush
must have come from that one.
--
2. I've been limping around all week. Nail on my
big toe is black, rest are swollen up. I'm not
buying those two-kilo jars of peanut butter any
more.
--
1. I saw a car driving backwards in traffic the
other day. Like, making all the stops and turns
and everything. Sometimes you just have to grab a
gear and go, but that seems a bit much.
## Bowl 1
10. Now, the fry pan is good for some of these, no
question. But the louder ones need something
stronger. For example, the skin-taker.
--
9. It's good to make thing prettier sometimes. But
things like that are so stationary. That's why
these little flower pots on wheels were such a
great idea.
--
8. They invented a robot that would ride a kick
scooter. For some reason, they added long hair to
it. It got tangled up in the knee servos, and that
was the end of that.
--
7. She had no idea if anyone would use the masks
she made. But every morning, the tin where she
left them was empty. Until someone took the tin,
too.
--
6. Between Mars and Jupiter, they discovered
something very big. They believe it is some kind
of vast fungus network. But no one yet knows on
what it feeds, or how long it has been there.
--
5. There are one thousand of them, maybe more. You
would think at least one of them would not be
broken. But every weekend, they take a lot of
abuse.
--
4. I can't put that cloth bag in the recycling.
You'd think I would have learned that by now. I
remember what happened last time.
--
3. When I came down the stairs last Tuesday, I
almost tripped on those pants I left there the
night before. I don't even know why I kept them.
You can't mend a rip that big, and whatever was in
that puddle left a stain that's never coming out.
--
2. When toast pops, it's like the end of
something, and the start of something. It's time
to get the peanut butter and a knife. But when you
have a drum of jet fuel under your table, that
changes how it goes.
--
1. I never liked having words on walls. It gave me
a funny feeling. But then I tried making them big,
and a funny thing happened.