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Re: Just fine (@tfurrows)
2019.12.20 21:22:14 CET
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tfurrows recently posted about how a common reply to "how are you?"
is "just fine" and asked what others understand by the expression[0].
There is a lot of cultural background in my answer. In Brazil it is
very common to start any conversation with "how are you?" which is
receives an even quicker "fine, and you?" and finally "fine". This is
much more like a TCP 3-way handshake than real conversation.
People don't expect anyone to answer sincerely to "how are you?" If
one provides a real answer, it will catch the other party by surprise
as they want to get on to the real subject they want to touch.
It's more a process to know whether the other person can talk to you
right now rather than interest in what is going on with them. "Are
you available to talk now?"
So how would most people understand "just fine"? They probably won't
even register what you answered and it will go unnoticed.
As you noted about tone, this is much more important. They delivery
of the answer - how long was the pause between question and answer?
how was the tone? what was the body language? This carries much more
weight.
For example, I like to keep eye contact when I'm talking to people.
My friends know this. If they ask how I am and I reply with "just
fine" looking at them, they will assume the conversation can go on.
If I look down or don't make eye contact, "just fine" will mean
"let's talk a bit later".
[0] gopher://zaibatsu.circumlunar.space/0/%7etfurrows/phlog/2019-12-19_just